Wanna know if he/she is The One? Travel together!

Next month The Husband and I will be celebrating nine years of marriage, which is pretty amazing considering all the crazy trips we’ve taken together.  I’ve always said the best test for a relationship is travel.  Trust me, if a couple can survive a bad trip together, that couple can handle just about anything – including marriage.  I’m proof of that.  Don’t believe me?  Here’s an email from The Husband describing a trip to Italy we took three years ago… 

We are here and a little worse off than we expected. Although still in love with Heather, I realize we can not be partners in a travel agency. When we arrived to Stansted airport,  the airline gave us a room at a nearby hotel for a shower and a little rest because we had a long wait between flights.  It was very nice of them.  They must have known the rest of our journey was going to be hell. After a quick shower, Heather and I went back to the airport where she somehow tested positive for explosives at security! That’s right EXPLOSIVES! Needless to say we were given special treatment and in the process I somehow lost ALL of our travel documents except our passports (thank God). I didn’t notice until we were already in flight on our second airline that made Southwest look like the Concorde. Heather told me not to panic because we could just print our tickets at the airport in Venice, which seemed feasible until we LANDED AT THE WRONG AIRPORT!  By this time you can just imagine what it was like being with me. Couldn’t get any worse you say? Fuck yes it could!  We didn’t have Euros and the only ATM in what was the New York version of Islip airport was broken. I had to pay 50 dollars for 20 Euros.  Then we jumped on a bus that took us through Trevisi and past Marco Polo airport – the airport we thought we were supposed to land at.  Eventually we were dropped off in some parking lot.  Figuring we were going to the Jewish Ghetto, I looked for a religious couple out of thousands of people and sure enough found one that was also going to Cannaregio.  But they, too, were lost.  I turned around and Heather is gone.  She’s walking away like she knows where the hell she is. The last thing I needed was to lose her, so I ran after her and the Jewish couple disappears.  I walked over to a water taxi and the guy wanted 90 dollars to take us to hotel which was less than a mile away. I refused to be ripped off for one more cent.  I asked a fireman to show us the way. Heather and I walked what seemed like an eternity over bridges and pitted streets with our luggage until we saw Hebrew writing and Rabbis speaking like Don freakin Corleone. After we finally reached the hotel, we dropped our bags and started eating. During dinner Heather actually fell asleep at the table.  We went to bed a 9pm and got up twelve hours later.  Heather woke up with trench foot and is itchy. All in all we are about 1,000 bucks down in re-ticketing, but we’re laughing. Heather has taken about 1,000 pictures and I haven’t pushed her trench foot ass into a canal yet.



  1. So, so true. My husband of 33 years and I get along very well and are great travel partners but on our last trip, I contracted a bad cold in Vancouver and proceeded to cough on the long flight home. All.the.way. I’m sure everyone on the plane was ready to kill me. When there were no taxis waiting at the airport, I told him to use his iPhone for something besides the hundreds of apps he has on it and he said, through gritted teeth “I’m a little tired of you AND YOUR COUGH”!! Can’t really blame him, though…

  2. Love this! My fiance and I travel all the time together (Flight Attendant and Pilot… yup!) I think that is exactly how I knew he was the one! We had a bag of stuff stolen on the last day of our first vacation together… ipod, camera and his glasses. We ended up having the most fun that last night despite all we lost! A good travel partner is the most important thing to have.

  3. I actually think that reverse logic does NOT work in this case. I think it’s a good sign if couples CAN travel together but not necessarily a bad sign if they can’t.

    Some of it might be circumstance. I’m a stay-at-home mom and as a former international Flight Attendant for 13 years, when we get out, I want to TRAVEL. My hubby, by contrast, does 80,000km a year. He wont budge from the side of the pool when we’re on vacation.

    We absolutely have to make compromises. I can only take so much pool-sitting but I’m not adverse to going out exploring by myself. Of course, I’m used to it (been to 50 countries and didn’t get married till age 35). I’m also not adverse to taking the kids by myself or leaving early and/or returning later.

    My husband hates London, my favorite city in the world while the kids agree with me. Needless to say, we really, really don’t need him around, complaining…

    Couples don’t have to like the same places and in the same way. Once there are kids, and once they have an opinion, trip-planning takes on even more challenges. Nice if they do but not a disaster if they don’t. So much variety in travel that a compromise can usually be found…

  4. As an airline employee, I have gotten to the point where I enjoy personal travel probably as much as porn stars enjoy going to orgies.

    My wife feels the same.

    Heather’s husband’s above story is something I can sympathize with… My also has this quirk whereby she thinks she knows where she is going despite being in a place she has never been before, nor is familiar with. A few years ago, she decides to take the lead as we are walking through the Frankfurt Germany airport. Mind you, she has no idea where to go. I just followed her out of amusement. After 10 minutes I asked, “how much further?” She stopped and said, I thought you knew where we are going. I said, “I do,” but since you where taking the lead, getting way out ahead of me, I thought I’d just follow you.”

    Another time she managed to wander off in the Copenhagen airport. I immediately lost sight of her in the sea of blond hair. Oh well, I was flying the jet back the US. I knew I had a seat and that the jet wouldn’t leave without me. If she missed the flight, that would teach her a lesson. Like a lost cat, she eventually turned up.

    And there have been many times I’ve wanted to push her into a Venetian canal. And visa versa. That’s what marriage is all about.

  5. Lol…”her trench foot ass”

    Travel brings out the best and worst in couples. My husband still refers to the ‘forced march’ in 100 degree weather through old town San Juan, PR that I took him on, and we have some great quotes that get brought up now and then from our Mediterranean honeymoon.

    Thanks for the great story, I’m going to share it with him to show that it’s not just us…

  6. The spouse and I have travelled pretty extensively in our 4 years of marriage, and both of us have travelled independently both before and after meeting each other. It’s something that’s important to us as a couple, and we always have a great time. That said, some of our biggest fights have occurred on our longer trips. After 2 or 3 weeks of getting lost, negotiating language/cultural barriers, and exhausting ourselves together, one of us just loses it. After that, things are fine. Despite that, there isn’t anyone in the world I’d rather travel with!

  7. Can relate to falling asleep at dinner in Venice. It’s never happened anywhere else. I fell asleep in the middle of a sentence. (Mine!)

    To get to Venice from here required a long flight (DFW to London), a long layover, and then a flight to Marco Polo. Then a boat ride, then getting lost trying to find the hotel. No wonder I was tired.

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